Relationships: more about it: less said the better

Another forced relationship : Siblings: You just can not choose them. But for a few genetic strands, the womb where you came from and few formative years of childhood, you don't share much. Do you share, really or you were made to share? When the word 'Informed Parenting'  was unheard of, the bias amongst the flock, that was their own, the parents used to exercise without any remorse, unabashedly. So intelligence  though was counted, used to take a back seat when looks came in the picture. Thus many childhood memories are tainted by this bias leaving permanent scars, those take the form of 'Sibling Rivalry'  in coming years. It's a well-known entity accepted by the science of mind and the word is so self-explanatory that no further deliberation is required.  

Brothers vowing not to see the face of others is such a common phenomenon in India that the topmost families in India too could not escape the diktat. Read Gandhis and Ambanis. In contrast, Brother- Sister relationships are always gracious, loving and empathic. Being a male I can not much comment about such a thing in sisters but examples are abundant. 

After sharing a beautiful childhood, where this bad blood could be setting in? In my opinion maybe, mostly after the entrance of the spouses in their lives. Somebody coming from different background, with a different set of values changes the scenario so much that at times it becomes difficult to believe that they once were siblings. Now they have their own families their own near and dear ones so they simply cease to remain the part of their parents' family,  a fact leaving a huge void for longing!

I never understood why one should be apologetic about one's genetic gifts. If being differently challenged, or being homosexual or underprivileged is taken now with an open mind and they are encouraged to come out openly and be as normal as possible, why a smart Alec is always booed or looked down upon. For the society of averages, it's very difficult to accept somebody to be smarter, more intelligent and gifted than them. It is very interesting to note that, society accepts 'Have nots' more willingly. Because here the attitude is condescending. In another case, it's plain jealousy. For the gifted one too, it is difficult to climb down and build bridges with somebody who is not on par. In families where this difference is palpable amongst the siblings the parents rather than bringing the two parties together, add fuel to the fire, knowingly, at times unknowingly. And this always becomes the nidus for the future 'Sibling Rivalry' At times it reaches to such a peak that one who becomes relatively successful starts boasting about his booty and starts expecting respect, at times demanding one! Respect or Ego amongst the siblings is a journey towards the nadir of relationship. As they, after all, are made of the same earth, this attitude becomes the beginning of the end of a relationship.

Friends are a different cup of tea altogether. You start alone on the journey of life and keep on meeting this wonderful set of people on the way, sharing your views, sharing your love, sharing your dream. You become friends with those only, who are like-minded, so those who are not, get eliminated automatically and that's the beauty of the process. It happens so smoothly without leaving any bad blood behind. Unfortunately, the ones whom you like but do not succeed in life money-wise, too get eliminated, not from your side but theirs. It's a loss nonetheless.[ Krishna-Sudama story is not for today's times. Krishna was a God after all.] It's true other way round too. Those who touch the zenith, enter the totally different circle and cease to be a part of your homely group.

Like love, though friendship happens, it can not be forced [ I want to be friends with Madhuri Dixit ], it has to be nurtured by both the parties. There is no one-way traffic here. A time comes in a life where your friends take place of your blood relatives, even near and dear ones and your quest for solace from the relationship comes to an end! I don't know, but I feel, real friendship starts only in childhood, when you are totally naked on all the fronts. Nothing to hide nothing to boast of! When the situation is thus at the outset, it becomes so endearing to share when one achieves. It becomes a collective achievement. This is the lot who pulls you down and does not allow you to lose contact with the earth. At their behest, your feet are firmly grounded, in most of the astounding conditions and in most adverse ones too!

Any relationship whether mother-child, siblings, friends, bosses or colleagues, mainly depends on what type of person YOU are. It becomes a two-way affair afterwards!

One traveller entering a new village asks the sentry,' How are the people of this village?' The sentry counters,' How were the ones in the previous one'. 'Oh, scoundrels. Cheaters and thieves.' Sentry says with a wry smile,' They are same here.'

Another traveller throws the same question. Sentry's counter-question was the same one too. In jovial mood traveller replies, 'Oh lovely ones. Helping, Caring, Very cooperative and friendly'  Sentry says with a grin ' These villagers too are same, friendly, cooperative and caring'.

Doesn't it tell-all?

P.S: This is not a dissertation for M. Phil. Just a few of my observations, thoughts and musings.

Relationships: A Big question mark

More than 60 years down the lane, I don't have the faintest clue still, 'what makes the two people click?' In general and on a personal level I tried to analyse but always drew a blank, many times neither here nor there, no definite conclusion. Whether the relationship is a forced one like blood relations or colleagues and roommates allotted by the authorities, or the chosen ones like spouses or friends, the statement holds true for all and sundry.
The front runner, the most primal is Mother-child relationship. 'Mother loves all her children equally ' is a myth, better if dispelled at the outset. Gender bias apart, it prefers the better one amongst the equals. Sons are preferred over daughters is a fact in a country like India where mothers' love is considered to be the epitome of sacrifice. But it's the same mother who sacrifices her daughters to beget a son for the family, going to the extent to commit the crime under the pretext of honour killing or 'Dudhjali'. Here one may add that the daughters though are treated secondarily are more attached to their mothers. So much so, that at times I have seen them snatching the husbands away from their mothers at the behest of own mothers! Again there are exceptions to the rule. Nutan slapping a lawsuit on her own mother Shobhana Samarth or vice a versa, Sarika being locked out and made to pass a night in the car by her own mother, the instances everybody knows!
I have known a mother who selectively treated her sons by their complexion, the fair one getting a better share of food, clothes schooling and everything while the darker ones were given secondary treatment! The elder ones are always brought up with a cane in the hand while the younger ones get away scot-free, is a rule rather than the exception! In one-child families the mothers are so doting that they suffocate the very individuality of the child. I had to reprimand one such mother who was always including herself in the activities of her child, 'We don't want to study, We are lazy, We like to sleep late even when exams are at the corner' Emphasis was on 'WE' and not on he or she! Rather than allowing the child to think on his/her own, the mother was doubling for him/her!
Another way round, a fact that mother too is as human as anybody else, is totally forgotten by the children. In many a family, she is kept on the pedestal just because she has borne children, though has done nothing else in life as a human being! Any word uttered by her is held like a gospel truth though it might be defying any logic or is miles away from the intellect! And the child goes to any lengths to fulfil the dream of THE mother that may cost him/her dearly. One such ' Maa ka Beta' was about to thrash me when I stopped her from spitting in the hospital corridor! 'HIS MOTHER' being stopped from a simple act like spitting? Unpardonable!
Another domain, where the relationship is by choice and shadowed by too many paradoxes is, Spouses! Man - Woman, Husband - Wife relationship! Every girl while selecting a suitable boy goes for his higher intelligence, higher pay, higher status, better family, better prospects anything better than her, maybe little compromise on looks' side, but as soon as the event, known as the wedding is done away with she immediately wants to be on par with him in every respect from the day one! So many times he has to just underplay his intelligence to please his lady love. 'My husband doesn't know a damn' is sole truth for her and she believes in it wholeheartedly though the husband might be having IQ of more than 150! Covert or overt there's always a fight amongst the spouses for 'Who should wear the pants in the house?'! There is always a war-like situation. "Why 'I' should take it to why 'I' have to compromise always.", are the warring points, though they do not hold water most of the times. The relationship itself is most of the time started on the wrong foot. Rather than planning for the love-filled co-existence together, 'He/she' must know/ must be shown who I am !' is always the first step of the ladder. Any relationship started on that note is going to be a jittery ride with lots of hiccups. And that's what I have seen in practically all the marriages around me. In one that claims to be a successful and smooth sailing, one spouse is invariably dominant and the other is so meek and submissive that he/she asks for a bucket when spouse orders to milk the bull!
The words are always hollow. We throw them in the air without care and empathy. One such word, unfortunately, is 'Relationship' used frequently without really knowing the meaning of it or working towards to develop it.

If You bear with me, more to follow!

Right to know.

The common doctor's cabin, except the ones who are attached to five-star hospitals, like Hinduja or Leelavati, is a thoroughfare, anybody having access any time. In India, a patient is always accompanied by at least 3 to 4 relatives who literally throng the cabin as if owning it. And rather than the patient they are the ones who are overly eager to furnish the history necessary for coming to the diagnosis. In such situations I literally have to shut them up and ask the concerned one, the patient to furnish the details, an approach abhorred by many from the tribe. They are not guardians but the custodians who decide everything for the well being of the patient though the affected party may be well past 40, having school going children and 20 years service in his/her kitty. If the patient is a female, may god save her, she is not allowed to speak even a word. The height is, not only she is not bothered but when prodded directly by me, looks at her male counterpart, maybe a husband or a son, for him to carry the conversation further. I then have to  interfere and say, "They are not the doctors, tell me, I am the one you have come to for your ailment." Sheepishly then she would venture to give out a few details which amount to like finding a needle in a haystack.
It so happens many a time that something bad/ sinister comes out of the entire examination, investigation routine. As soon as I am about to declare it, the antennas of these custodians are upped in no time and they start gesticulating to convey their displeasure about revealing it to the patient. 'Don't tell him/her, it will affect him/her. he/she won't be able to take it, it may be a big psychological jolt you know! So far we haven't told him.' etc. etc.
I never ever understood this stance. The normal human mind is extremely resilient and can absorb many a shock with dignity. Those who can't, are already weak psychologically and are not going to cope up with the situation anyway! WHO has accepted it as a human right to know about oneself, one's body. These so-called custodians are depriving the patient of this right, under the guile of ' How much we care for you !' A total pseudo mask, that comes off immediately when I try to explain further.
'He is suffering from a cardiac problem [ or any such life-threatening disease], if HE doesn't know, he is going to run to catch a missing bus and going to fall dead when you are not going to be there for him for 24 hrs. Forget about catching a bus even if he strains while passing the motions he may pass out in the loo itself. Are you going to accompany him to loo every time? If HE knows he will take care of himself. And there is nobody in the world who could take better care than one himself !' Unfortunately many a time it falls on the deaf ears and the army of well-wishers wins in the end.

After receiving prompt treatment for Acute Myocardial infarction within the right frame of time, one of my female patients recovered completely with a total reversal of ECG. Husband arrived from outstation next morning insisting on discharge as the patient did not have any complaint by then. I cajoled, insisted, tried to explain, requested him to take her to another hospital of his community/choice if he was not happy with our treatment but all went down the drain. In the end, I had to discharge her against medical advice within 24 hours of admission [ For Acute Myocardial Infarction]. Point to be noted is, 'In the entire scenario the patient/ wife did not have any say !' As expected, unfortunately, she died at home within 4 to 6 hrs of discharge.  Now, who should be held responsible? Naturally, the Hospital refused to issue a death certificate and asked for Post mortem. No sooner word PM was uttered he vamoosed in the thin air without leaving a trace.
Again a female patient running 104* F fever was forcibly taken home, on the insistence of distant father in law, uncle of husband, to look after the kids as there was no extra female helping hand at the home !.
RTI,[Right To Information] has governmental air about it. So that's out but every person must have the right to know about him, his body, his ailment, how he takes it, should be his problem.  The doctor in the picture is an expert in the field and for this very expertise, the patient comes to him, to know, where he stands. The sugar-coated pill is a thing of past, if the pill is going to be bitter there should not be any hesitance on part of the doctor to dispense it, it's patient's problem whether to swallow it or not!  That's right to know. So if one knows, he/she can plan out his/her life as per one's own wishes. Least, as well-wishers, we can do !

Death: And Beyond

I was 3 days old, professionally, when death slapped me on the face for the first time and made me realize, what life is all about. So far I had seen the death from a distance, in terminally ill patients in the ICCU of our school's hospital, who were destined to die. And I didn't treat them, somebody senior, more experienced one, was managing the show of which, I was a distant spectator, hardly making any impression of black tragedy on my psyche.

Around 40 years ago, fresh from the medical school bursting at seams with theoretical knowledge, I was made to treat a 17 years lad, hardly 17 with a faint trace of masculinity on his upper lip gasping for his last breath. He was caught between the two vehicles plying in opposite directions twisting his torso. Far away from the era of MRIs, CTs, USGs we, in that ill-equipped [Very Very mild word!] Civil Hospital in the permanently drought-stricken area of Maharashtra could hardly lay our hands on single ECG machine that too after a lot of perusal and permissions, forget about modalities like Pulse oximeter or ventilator. I trembling with anxiety was trying to memorize the CRP and was doing my level best. The nurses brought up with typical government attitude were of no help either. After demanding one life-saving injection, they used to run around in all the directions without any result even after wasting precious minutes. So if for Inj. Adrenaline I had to wait for 10 minutes, which are very, very crucial, I had to wait for Inj. Effcorline for another 15 minutes. After struggling for 15 minutes or so, his body lay calm in front of my eyes. The life that was struggling to live gave up and went cold leaving me colder. Though not devastated in any melodramatic way I nonetheless was very shaken to the core after seeing the frugality of life from the close quarters. 2 days after the incident senior medical officer who performed PM on him, told me as if to reassure, 'My lad, I was 23 then, there was nothing you could have done to save him. He had so many internal injuries that it was impossible to save him at our level. So don't take it to the heart! '. So easily said for a life that did not get a chance to bloom.

So many deaths I had to certify thereafter, that though did not ask for it, unknowingly heart and mind started taking it, 'THE Death', more casually. Harsh words to digest but every doctor has to face this reality to preserve his sanctity to treat the next one in the line. 

Though I went through this routine more mechanically, unwillingly, some deaths lingered in the mind for long, long enough to make a dent somewhere inside.

Death is such a final statement, which can not be rewritten come what may, makes people around, react in such a complex manner that at times it becomes extremely difficult to handle the situation.

One spouse coming from extremely well settled middle class family was suffering from end-stage AIDS, and I was treating the patient right from the detection of positivity for HIV. Around the turn of the century when situations varied from total non-availability of Antiretroviral drugs to very expensive ones coming from abroad, leaving the relatives bankrupt after the death of the loved ones. It was extremely difficult to face the family day in and day out when death was certain. Though I had explained every detail to the near and dear ones I was pressurized from not so near ones, say uncle or brother in law, hinting at times about my incompetency bordering on to the negligence, to come out with the diagnosis. l was not allowed to disclose it medico legally. And there was furore after the death, which was inevitable. But I was not prepared to take the flack from the relatives including the near and dear ones, whom I have explained every detail about the disease painstakingly. After taking the crap for long, in desperation, I had to take the reasonable one aside and had to tell him in firm words that if the chaos does not stop at once I am going to declare the cause of the death and disease his father suffered from. It struck hard very hard. And within minutes the loud howling and wailing stopped along with finger pointing at the hospital and me. That was social stigma then and even now but I had to use it to save the situation and bring senses to the unruly family.

But the sincerity always percolates. So when the other spouse detected positive, the family rushed to me for the treatment. By then as the drugs were made available, the living spouse has completed more than 12 years of life fruitfully, seeing all the daughters getting married and grandchild from son. And I am grateful to the family who had immense faith in me to allow me to treat every member of their family thereafter, even when the first one succumbed to AIDS under my surveillance.

That's only one experience and there are many more. 

Over the years after every death, I sink a little more and at the same time brace myself to face the next one. Death of young one leaves a deep scar though it was destined, at times when octogenarian takes his last breath and family runs amok I don't get it. Just don't get it. They say and it's nature's rule that everyone has to face death some time or the other and other such blah blah, but when it confronts them in the face they behave as if everyone is immortal especially their very very old parents and death can not touch them. I feel, rather than the death they are afraid of the life they have to face after the void, that's more painful! Life IS a bigger challenge than death, which is a one-time affair and life.... it goes on and on and on.....

American Dream

Most of the upper middle class homes in Marathi speaking diaspora is having at least one child settled abroad, mostly in the US of A, with reducing numbers in Australia and Europe. Present-day elderly Marathis, [ I refuse to call them Maharashtrians, as, by Maharashtra Government's definition, the one who has a domicile of 10 years in Maharashtra is a Maharashtrian. After spending a lifetime in Maharashtra many of these so-called Maharashtrians don't assimilate and still remain Gujratis, Tamils or Punjabis and detest to speak in local language Marathi, rather take pride in saying, "Oh I don't speak Marathi, the Ghatis' language in the bracket, You know !"  No, I don't know, No, I don't understand the stance. Well let's not get there, the forbidden territory, lest I would be labelled parochial.], are experiencing the syndrome best labelled as 'Empty Nest Syndrome'. After trying to find An American dream at the end of a rainbow they allowed their kids to pursue the dream, they failed to make real, this lot, in the end, is left bewildered,  confused and lonely. Is THE American Dream really is a dream to long for?

Had been to states on a longish holiday, very long but holiday nonetheless, practically living out of bags after allotting 3 to 4 days per place, maximum 7, when living with a relative or a friend, so won't be able to, rather should not comment on locals, about their dreams or aspirations. But what struck, without doubt, was plush, lustre, gloss and supermarkets over flooded with goodies, the one thing that we in India longed for, in those days. Kids though looked through the facade, maybe because of their naivety and transparency, so found it superfluous and gross, a society without human touch, warmth and intimacy. May be for us 'Colored People'! A reality which struck me very late, after a decade or so, when I chanced to see a film, 'The Butler' by Lee Daniel.

It's a story of a Black Butler and his family, who served in the white house for over 30 years lending his services to many presidents, from Mr Eisenhower to Mr Ronald Regan, a story of horrifying trials and tribulations of The Black community in 2nd half of 20th century, the most 'Happening' century. The Story of the birth of Black Panthers! While white America was trying to paint a rosy picture of THE American Dream for the rest of the world, she was allowing her Black problem to be burnt on the back burner, literally, to shy away from the prying eyes!

It though did not come as a shock but really rattled me deep inside making an uneasy feeling about the dreamland. We, all said and done, in the eyes of blue-blooded true white American [Though he, himself is alien to the land he snatched away from the native Indians] are going to remain as coloureds, maybe brown but all the same, coloureds, 'others' all the time. Though the real battle is/was between the blacks and the whites, we always remained on the fringe never ever belonging to the inner circle of whites, albeit nearer to the black though, we would rather choose to distance ourselves from them.[ We are Browns, not Blacks you know!]

India adopted for Democratic Governance way back in 1952 and right from the day one, women, backwards [ who compare themselves with the blacks from The states, but in my opinion, there is a vast difference, sometime later about it. ] and downtrodden are having voting rights, equal pays, right to promotion and so may other rights by 'The constitution'. And these rights were and are being brought in to practice in all the walks of life. In the Government, more so. It was really shocking to know that the Blacks did not have equal pays, on par with the whites though they were discharging similar duties, even in THE WHITE HOUSE, forget about the rest of America, especially the Southern states, like Texas, Alabama Mississippi etc. And THE white management of white house was supporting the system till recently. Till Hon. Regan's presidency! That means only a few years ago in MY lifetime! Not a thing of yore or bygone days!

And this is a tip of the iceberg. Just an example. The movie shows so many, so many other discrepancies against blacks that you really shudder. And this America boasts of the American dream?

Mr Obama getting elected as President might be a token gesture. May be just that! Like we calling our downtrodden as class four officers/ Harijans but hardly making any dent on their social and other status! The Blacks adopted America as their country though they basically are from Africa, adopted their god, though white, adopted their language, adopted their culture, adopted their cause to die for, [ ?? Vietnam] but still are lingering on the border of the inner circle, to be really taken in, a point to ponder, point to think,  point to imbibe for those who still want to pursue that  [? Illusive ] American Dream.

Has the American Dream Gone sour?

God: An obsolete concept

The fascination for the concept of God started wearing off for me as I grew older and older. Does it or should it? In young age, probably everybody is God-fearing as the concept is not clear. We are introduced to the very concept by our mother. She is the one who indoctrinates us into this divine field so the strength of a person's bond with God becomes as strong or as rational as he/she is having with the mother. Some times the lines are so blurred that the Mother takes the form of God and in India it is rampant. The very fact, She too is a human being like any other,   becomes secondary. 

For the intellectually middle class [ not financially/ economically] the package named  'God' is very attractive. For it, it is Something, unknown, unproven, unseen but serene, pious and sublime supernatural power. It not only controls every aspect of their life but decides their fate and destiny too! They simply surrender.  According to this class, even a lone leaf on a tree does not move without his [ her ?] will. Now if you really accept this, then it's a tremendous job. Right from moving the last leaf on the 13th twig of 106th tree on the central avenue of 17 sector of the city of San Paolo in Brazil to pushing the ball played by Rafa Nadal in the net during a crucial match of Australian Open Tennis. From arranging a marriage of docile African lass with a boy she doesn't like to creating a tsunami on the Malaysian coast and killing thousands of people in one go! How big a piece of machinery it would require to carry out all these tasks, is beyond my brain's imagination and capacity!

For this class, the faith in God is a positive thing, conveniently keeping aside the fact that every positive must have a negative to balance. So they don't believe in Satan, black magic, sacrifices and ghosts. For them, this amounts to blind faith. In fact, these are sides of the same coin. So faith in any other way is always blind! To prove scientific findings you don't have to have faith, like boiling water scalds, is not faith, blind or otherwise, it's a fact. Can same be said about God whom nobody has seen or whose existence has not been proved scientifically beyond doubt so far!

The plurality of God is yet another aspect of this concept, that is difficult to fathom. We have 33 crores Gods. May be in ancient India everybody was called God because that might be the entire population of India then. Maybe half, as this is the number of 'Surs' [Gods], there were 'Asurs' too [ Don't feel like calling them sons of Satan, maybe Non-Gods]! It has so much of political hue that it's better to be left alone. Fair-skinned, tall handsome, intelligent Aryans from North proclaimed themselves to be 'Surs' while dark, short and not so handsome but in the real sense the original inhabitants of India were labelled as 'Asurs'. So their Gods differed too. [So called ] High caste Hindus don't worship 'Mari Aai, Vetoba, Mhasoba, or Kadak Laxmi ' who are the Gods of downtrodden. Tribal Gods change every 12 miles and no higher caste Hindu is even aware of them and likes to push them under the blanket by labelling Tribals' faith as blind!

Even if we don't consider Hinduism as a religion, because it's not a religion and is a way of life, there are so many other religions all over the world having their own Gods amounting to the plurality of the concept. How could this all-encompassing, all-knowing, all-forgiving supernatural power be different for every individual? And disciples fight, many a time killing each other for the very concept that is serene pious and sublime! In the history of mankind, more wars have been fought and more people have died for this concept, this faith, this blind faith!

If as a concept we take God to be 'Satyam, Shivam, Sundaram' how come he used to test the faith of his disciples by letting them go through ordeals beyond human endurance? He should have known at the outset only, that who is his earnest follower and who is not. God is not an examiner for the university's 3rd-year exam! Moreover, every God has likes and dislikes not only in Food but in colours of his clothes to vehicle he uses. These are nothing but human qualities given by humans to him because it was the man who floated the concept!

Is it any different today in the 21st century? Sadly no, NO in big capitals. On one hand, we won't accept Blood from the different group but on the other, go and worship the Gods who don't have any scientific basis. I am not against any body's personal beliefs that give them psychological booster in difficult times but now it's taking an ugly turn and We are losing the perspective. We are getting too carried away by the concept, mind you, it's only a concept and in the name of God, inflicting pain on the others that's totally contradictory to the very concept itself !

Performance/Acting

What is acting all about? What's good performance?

Had gone to watch 'Birdman' with a lot of scepticism. It was difficult to say what were the feelings after it was over, but definitely impact was not negative. At times subtle at times overt, the ongoing war between the superhero and the actor catches you, but not by the throat, like it caught you in 'One flew over the cuckoo's nest'. Nonetheless, it has that experimental quality about it, which reminds you of what you did in the 70s and 80s, at least in Marathi theatre on Chhabildas stage. Had done a lot of such one-act plays during college days and felt like visiting that yore again. We presented them with gusto though going well over the heads of the audience many times, at times even the cast, but it was the call of the day then,  so we did them and were proud of it!   

Michael Keaton was superb as Riggan Thomson but did not at any juncture feel that we fall short on this front by any account. We too have our lot of stars and actors on par with Hollywood, maybe not more, but definitely not less.

One such performance that hit the silver screen recently, was given by Mr.Nana Patekar in 'Dr Prakash Baba Amte'. Nana's personality does not really suit the protagonist Dr Amte, as he is known as the humble, polite, soft-spoken gentleman of few words. On the contrary, Mr.Patekar's body language is aggressive. After going through umpteen number of loud and unrealistic roles mechanically, or maybe because of stories about his behaviour off-screen, making rounds aplenty, or maybe because of plain bias on my part, Mr Patekar's choice for the role of Dr Amte was a case of miscasting. While watching the movie one kept on feeling that Mr Patekar has donned the garb of calculated politeness and the effort shows. In one or two scenes, even that mask comes off. Once when the leopard dies and after the horrifying delivery, the protagonist has to perform. I don't know either Mr Patekar or Dr Amte personally but going by what is said about Dr Amte I feel he wouldn't have cried the way Nana has cried. Filmy, loud and gross! Dr Amte definitely must have felt sad, but he must have hidden his tears behind a brave front, internalizing his personal anguish.

Nandu Madhav or Atul Kulkarni would have fitted the bill perfectly but they don't carry the halo around them like Nana, so...!

My prejudices apart, there are no doubts that overcoming these personal shortcomings, Mr Nana Patekar has given a brilliant performance.

Actually, that's not the point. The point is performance, acting.

There are dime a dozen duplicate Nana Patekars, Amithabh Bachchans, Sanjeevkumars and so many others, enthralling the audiences of street orchestras and on any two penny stage, on the obscure corners of the dinghy gullies. My question is, 'If any actor if that easily could be mimicked, is really that  great an actor?' Because this type of stylized theatrical 'Acting' is lapped up by the naive patrons,  it thrust upon them repeatedly. And Poor viewer too takes it to be a 'Performance par excellence !'

Mr Nana Patekar is not alone here, there were and are many renowned so-called stalwarts who market the overacting. With the motto ' This is what acting is all about' these greats as if tell the patrons,'Come on let me show you [ moron] what it means by THE performance !' Rajkumar topped the list of this arrogance. With Profound apologies I have to say, late  'Dr Kashinath Ghanekar' too was sold to this type of attitude. In fact, plays were written with him and his acting calibre in mind and surprisingly they used to run to packed housed too! In the play ' Ashrunchi Zaali Phulay' he used to get thundering applause for his delivery of word ' Kadak'. I was hardly 16 at that time, but found it odd even then and felt  'This is NOT acting !' When Chittaranjan Kolhatkar joined him in it, in the later performances it was limit!

Again with heartfelt apologies, Sanajy Mone, Nasiruddin Shah Prabhakr Panashikar belong to the class. To a certain extent even Shabana Azami. Late Sanjeevkumar and Bhakti Barve too were expert in this game.

What then is real acting. Those who have clean slates really have given masterpiece performances.  Late Smita Patil and Nutan did not have any set pattern of acting. Similarly, Om Puri and Madhuri Dixit measure up to the mark, as they don't have any style. [ have you seen anybody mimicking them ?] 

Sharmila Tagore,, Dev Anand, Raj Kapoor even Dilipkumar many a time went through the roles mechanically, but they knew it and never pretended that they were performances. It was like 'Demand and Supply' and it was compromise for the market, no false assurance of the 'Acting'. Rajesh Khanna ruled the roost here!

In my definition of Real Actor/ performer, Late Smita Patil was perfect. Just to analyze, not to dissect, let's take Late Satyajit Ray's 'Sadgati', Late Sunil Dutt's 'Dard ka Rishta' and Shyam Benegal's 'Manthan' and 'Bhumika' 

In Sadgati and Manthan she was a rural woman without an introduction to ABCs. But the roles were so different and Smita conveyed the nuance of the respective role so effectively that hats off to her. Naive, subservient, in love with her husband, downtrodden woman of Sadgati was totally different from that stern, full with self-confidence, sharp and articulate protagonist of Manthan.

Patient, understanding, calm NRI Doctor of Dard ka Rishta was miles away from, though the actress but with middle class values,  rebel and simmering from within Heroine of Bhumika. These were the performances to be watched for, for her craft alone. In every role, she changed her torso, her body language to even her gait and dialogue delivery!

Real performance can not be copied! Her performances were never like a cast from the same mould so were never stale and were full with vigour and vitality! Always!

Nutan, Balraj Sahani too carried the same mantle.

Hollywood has a casting director. Sadly we don't. So when we see any performance by Hollywood actor, it sounds real because the actor is selected for his/her suitability for the role and not because he/she sells on the box office.

I am waiting for such thing to happen here, till then it's left only to suffer!

Ayurveda : Few more muses: In continuation

Don't know what reaction the first part created. But I have come across many Indians even educated ones, who believe in our greatness without asking for any proof. Like God, they just believe in it. I am not disrespecting them or ridiculing them or belittling the Indian ethos and culture but the point to be bothered about is, where we stand TODAY in the world ranking? 'Doesn't matter' is not the answer. We should think, introspect, rectify the mistakes done by our ancestors and move on. One should ask questions, try to understand, imbibe, modify and then move on. Unfortunately Indian youth is still living the life their parents want them to live, right from which course to select, which job to accept to which spouse to marry! The one who does not rebel, has no right to call himself youth! 

The human race originated in Africa and then migrated all over the world, our right-wing historians may not agree to this, but that's what the rest of the world accepts today. Wherever medieval man settled, there started a civilization. Thus we have Bushmen in Africa with their beliefs and culture[ Remember 'God must be crazy'], Maoris down under in New Zealand and Australia, Eskimos in Iceland and Alaska and here we Indians in India with our own system of tribals. Not only these civilizations tried to find the meaning of life, but they also developed their own medicinal systems too. We know 'Ayurveda' because it's ours. But how many of us are aware of Medicinal systems being practised in Mid and South America by Maya civilians. And if somebody from Taiwan gets up and says 'We have 100% cure for erectile dysfunction[ They use genitalia of Tiger to make such decoction or thus the word goes !] how many of these pro-porters would volunteer to try it, some may, for extra [!] stamina but what about Diabetes or Hypertension? In short, even Lion knows to eat grass on an upset stomach, it's hardly surprising that human with 100 times more wisdom than lowly cats, observes certain medicinal properties of shrubbery and bushes and pushes it as Herbal Medicine or Ayurveda!     

The problem here is of authentication and standardization [Bio Standardization]. Any drug/medicine developed by Modern Medicine today, say an antibiotic, used in measured proportions gives 99% effect in Chinese, Hispanics, Americans or Asians.

The crux of the problem lies with the  'Research'. The very word, maybe, abhorred by our elders. We as civilized ones were not allowed to ask questions. 'If elders are telling just do it' was the Mantra. The TV invented by Bayard is on display in the museum today. I have 3D V in my house. And it was possible only through research. Moreover, this is not applicable to gazettes only but to every walk of life. That includes Medicines and drugs too. Where we as Indians drag our feet, is in this area. Anything new in the market 'We always knew of this'. The new invention,  ' Oh had this from Ramayana times'. What a vacuous pride!

In 1947 the life expectancy in India was around 37 years. 5000 years old 'Ayurveda' was prevalent then too! Epidemics like Plague, Cholera, Smallpox were rampant. Even Tuberculosis did not have any answer then, in Ayurveda. The death rate in pregnancies, parturition and early childhood was extremely high. What solace Ayurveda did give to these poor victims? None. Today in 2015 the same life expectancy in our own India has reached 67, and I don't think Ayurveda has anything to do with it! Those who feel it is should say goodbye to MRIs, CT scans, ECGs and catch next bullock cart home!

Why today Ayurveda is in demand? The patients of all the diseases, where according to Modern medicine, the fault lies in your genes, like Immune deficiency Diseases, or diseases those are not cured but have to be kept under control like Diabetes, Hypertension, Rheumatoid Arthritis, are tired of taking medicines and do not want to have answer' No'. This one is a gullible lot that falls prey to tall claims made by these alternative medicine experts and suffers a lot in the end. Does Ayurveda really have the answers for ' Myocardial Infarction, Cerebral bleed, simple Tuberculosis later turning in to XDR and so many, so many other diseases which could be lethal if not treated in time? [ It would really be a catastrophe if Indian psyche wouldn't have come out of this mindset!]  

It's not surprising that after being so much in demand, 'Ayurveda' is commercialized. Under the pretext of 'Market demands' Ayurvedic medicines are now available in Capsules and Tablet forms. Now, this is a big puzzle. From where did Ayurveda get the concept of Capsule? ' Get Sugar checked, 'Matra' has to be increased.' Now how Blood sugar is measured by Ayurvedic methods? In that case real, the real Ayurvedacharya should be in a position to tell whether the blood sugar is 60 or 300 by checking the pulse alone, the commonest method adopted by the experts in this field! Then and then only the claim that we knew of Diabetes since olden times will hold water, otherwise it would be like jumping on the bandwagon!  

'Sugar-Free Tooth Paste' is not the lone star in this melee of gross commercialization, there are dime a dozen! This is a glaring example of 'Sugar-Free' fad going on in the society/market as of now. At the outset the concept of 'Tooth Paste' IS western, when did Ayurveda start pro-porting it? And if one wants to use it, how much one can use it, half an inch, one inch? And how much Sugar would be there in that 'One Inch'? Even if we take that children eat toothpaste, does it go in tonnes? and to consume sugar in tonnes is the paste Shrikhand or Gulab Jamun?

'Lowers Insulin Levels in few minutes' '100% reduction in Insulin levels'. These are the claims made by another sugar-lowering Ayurvedic product, making its show daily on TV. Now when did Ayurveda invent 'Insulin'? How do they measure the Insulin levels by Ayurvedic Methods? In what 'Type' of Diabetes is it indicated? If they really know that if Insulin is not used in type One Diabetes it could be fatal, how come this advertizement is allowed on National/ International television?

'Combined Therapy' is another ploy used by these Banias to take advantage of the lack of knowledge of these hapless patients. The highest court of the country has banned the usage of medicines of one discipline by others' experts. Secondly, there are no studies, no research in this respect. Nothing is known about the actions/ interactions of these drugs given together. And perpetrators of this, are en-cashing on the ignorance and the gullibility of these patients.

As said earlier in this propaganda, the victim is a hapless gullible patient suffering from an incurable disease. Moreover, the  'Indian' patient is held between the crossfire, neither here nor there! But the paradox is, that the one who is not bothered while eating anything given under the pretext of 'Prasad', even made a month ago, or any herb given as Herbal medicine, questions about the side effects of Modern medicine in the 1st meeting though hasn't succeeded in crossing even the 4th grade!  

Right from the early morning, even though we all are 100% Indians, we are using practically everything coming from the west. Be it the mattress, with research going in, to decide what material it should be made of to its thickness, what should be the elasticity of inner wear, to how many whistles of a pressure cooker, cooks the rice but not the pulses, a simple watch, 9.27 double fast, 4 number double-decker, this site, the computer used to run this site, the list is really really endless, it would go on even if the brain tires! We celebrate when our spacecraft reaches Mars in the 1st attempt but in the same breath, we reject a girl having 'Mangal' in her horoscope. The real problem lies with the attitude and approach and not with 'Indian ness'! Of Scientific temperament and to practice it on a day-today basis!

Those who believe in our ethos blindly should proclaim unabashedly that we don't believe in Western technology and we won't use it! Why only Modern Medicine be singled out?

Ayurveda : Few Musings [ English]

After practising for more than 40 years in so-called 'Allopathy' [ In truest sense it actually is Modern Medicine but the way caste, in India, doesn't leave you till the end, this nomenclature has become the norm rather than the exception. This thinking of Medicine can not be called any 'Pathy' as it's just application of common knowledge, achieved through Biology, Biochemistry, Biophysics to the human body], I am finding it intriguing that other Pathies especially Ayurveda are getting so much of exposure and accolade. Most surprising is, even  Modern medicine stalwarts are espousing the' Ayurvedic'  cause. At the outset, I sincerely salute them and apologize but would like to continue all the same.

If you really give a thought, in any 'Pathy' Human body is not different. Anatomy, Physiology, Pathology Radiology is the same for the human body, so it is for all the pathies, be it Yunani, Homeopathy, or Ayurveda. But they don't have any qualms using these modalities to the hilt though invented by Modern medicine. What is singled out is Pharmacology. It is as if a student scoring cent per cent marks in all other subjects, failing in pharmacology. There, our 'Sago' pills and 'Decoctions' score distinction. Weird thinking!

Let's go a little deeper.

Forget our Solar system with its planets and Sun,  our galaxy, our nebula, and innumerable galaxies and nebulae thereafter, in short, entire Universe that we know of, is composed of 118 elements. Right from the first Hydrogen to the last Unonoctium. Out of the list, last few, like 113, 115, 117, 118 are extremely unstable and are still on the lab papers but most of them, practically amounting to 98, are found on the Earth, though in minuscule amounts. Leave apart medicines, every article in the world, right from Grand ma's steel utensils to young one's toy pistol, from Sis's lipstick to uncle's Gel pen, each and every object is made up of these elements, though in the different molecular configuration.

And medicines are no exception, they too are chemicals.

If Herbal, Yunani, Ayurvedic medicines are made from earthen raw materials, are the  Modern medicines made of Martian raw materials? They too are made from the raw materials available on this very earth. Just for the sake of argument if we take that they are from the Outer space and are not suitable for the earthen atmosphere, then in what way the elements from outer space are different than the earthen elements?

In short, whether the medicines are Yunani, Homeopathic, Ayurvedic  or 'Allopathic' they all are made of the same elements. In simple terms the way even school going kid understands that H2O is water on Earth, Mars or on a distant planet of a distant galaxy, can the stalwarts of Ayurveda enumerate all the molecules present in 'Ashwagandha' the miracle drug often tomtomed by Ayurveda. And go further and tell that, which out of these innumerable molecules, are useful in particular ailment and the others in other diseases?  [As the claim goes this medicine is effective in every other disease from spermatorrhoea to cancer.[ Don't throw 'This is our experience' type of vacuous claim.] If you hit a hammer on the head, it breaks, is an experience, but what should be the weight of the hammer, with what force it should be hit, in what direction it should hit the head, is science and it only would tell us how the head broke! Questions and questions. No experience alone! How many medicines from other pathies can stand this challenge?

Foodstuff, Sweeper, Plastic tiffin box, Nine-yard sari,  all these are made of different elements so they all have their own different properties. And we use these properties to our benefit. Thus we don't use nine-yard sari to concoct a recipe.

Similarly, all the chemicals/molecules which are used for medicinal purpose have their own properties, rather because they have these properties they are used as medicines.   [Simplest chemical like water, our own H2O too has many properties. When it's warm, it is used to foment the sore throat, but when it's hot, it scalds. Now should it be called as water's 'Side Effect' ?]

For example, the molecule of Atropine has 3 properties, A, B and C. And they can be used in diseases 1, 2 and 3. Point to ponder is if property A is useful in disease 1, properties B and C become side effects. Similarly in disease 2 if property B is useful, properties A and C become side effects. Same stands for property C and disease 3. Science means, to understand which property to be made use of in what disease!

Thus 'Modern Medicine' is maligned for its side effects. To top it, it's claimed by other pathies that their medicines don't have side effects. The hitch is, as other pathies don't have any research backing them, they don't even know the side effects of their medicines!

A simple example should suffice here. A drop of Ink is a drop of ink for its blueness and saturation. If this drop is 'dropped' in a tank of water, it will cease to be ink and won't be blue either!  [ You then safely say that it doesn't stain, no side effect !]

If corollary is to be given, molecule P1 from Ashwagandha is useful for disease X. But to have the medicinal effect of factor P1 you have to swallow the molecules ABCD to XYZ constituting Ashwagandha. How many of these molecules, these stalwarts know of? And what about 'their' side effects? And in the melee of these molecules does our P1 really work or its effects are diluted in hundreds of other molecules so there are no side effects? [ Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, Sir Newton has said,  so corollary would be if you don't have a reaction you don't have action too!]. And if we assume that P1 really work wonders, then does anybody know, what's its chemical configuration, How may 'H' s and how many 'C' s are there and how are they configured? Rather than blaming modern medicine for its side effects, if these stalwarts spend their energy to solve these posers, better would be achieved. But if the case may be,  should these medicines thus researched be then called Ayurvedic medicines? Because the raw material is not any branches' prerogative.

Any disease means some defect in internal homeostasis, because of a variety of factors. To divide all the diseases along with the world population, only using 3 factors would be too simplistic. Plus these 'Dosh' s  are too empirical. Any living cell has a definite number of chromosomes. To wit, Human cell contains 23 pairs of chromosomes, barring sperm and ovum. If permutation and combinations are to be carried out there would be innumerable possibilities. And this is not applicable to humans alone, all living world fits in. Simple species like fish has such a vast variety because of this, that it's beyond any body's imagination. So to base entire medicinal structure only on this 3 ' dosh' is not only irrational but dangerous also, especially in a country like India where ignorance/ illiteracy rules and scientific outlook and temperament is grossly in short supply. 

Recently one such Ayurvedic stalwart stated that Pungent taste is an expression of 'Tej' from 'Panch Mahabhute'. I was simply flummoxed. In which era are we? Pre Mahabharata or 21st century?

How many chillies are known to Ayurveda? Mexico produces more than 70 types of chillies. Wikipedia says there are more than 39 species of chillies and their pungency comes from an alkaloid known as 'Capsaicin'. More the Capsaicin, more the pungency. So, because Yellow and Red bell pepper have it the least, they are least pungent. Mexico does not pro port to the concept of 'Panch Mahabhute' still their chillies are most Pungent!

We Indians have this nasty habit of blaming everything coming from the west. But we don't bash an eyelid while wanting the latest model of Mobile coming from the west. Color TV is thing of past, we are too eager to have 3 D TV.  In medical technology too we want the latest MRI, CT scan or pathology tests. If it is covered under insurance, we want it even when it is not indicated. There are so many like these waiting in every doctors' cabin, but when it comes to the selection of a bride for their son, they don't want a girl with Mars badly placed in her horoscope [ why take a chance ?]  or 'Allopathic' medicine, which for them, is too 'Strong' or has 'Side effects', [ Ayurvedic is okay, it doesn't have side effects/ or effects too].
The whole thing boils down to lack  of scientific temperament in Indian populace. The crux of the problem is where to start and how to imbibe it?  

AYURVEDA:FEW MUSINGS