What's in the name

What’s in the name?

No, I am not going ahead with the remaining part of the quote by the bard aka Shakespeare. It’s so schoolish to write a blog, that you take a quote, any quote, by some famous author, writer, orator, philosopher anybody for that matter but notably well heard, make some jugglery of words around whatever he has said and deliver a blog without real pains. I rather would like to start it with a joke that goes like this.

American when gets spare time, uses his credit card beyond his reach and tries to live life as rich as possible by wining, dining and womanizing. He is just not bothered about his ancestors. For him, it’s, ‘Today’. Englishman on the contrary, breaks his head in searching, ‘Who was his maternal great grand uncle in the queen’s paraphernalia?’ Frenchman tries to find, 'Who his father was', gives up in exasperation and turns to the sidewalk café for his quota of wine and baguette.

Me? It was accidental for me!

I never liked my name as well as my surname in school days, when very young and not exactly abhorred but detested as a young adult. It’s a human tendency that at one tier you want to belong to but at other you want to keep your identity as far as possible unique. ‘I am so and so but I am not like them!’And it was to happen with me too!

I was enrolled in the school by my maternal uncle because of his connections and he made the mistakes. I did not/don’t have a birth certificate so the birth date put was ambiguous while the name instead of Shashikant was put as Shashikumar. In the end, my name became a train with extra bogies on either side. Shashikumar Narayan Benurwar and how I detested it! I could do something about my name but the surname stuck up with me because my parents and siblings use the same surname. On changing the name to original one, a peculiar situation arose. So the father of my firstborn is Shashikumar while younger one tells her father to be Shashikant. While my wife’s husband at one place was Shashikant at others it was Shashikumar. It took months and lots of efforts to bring unanimity on all the fronts, [My son is still sore on the subject], though my wife retired as Shashikumar as her husband!

My surname is very uncommon in western Maharashtra, so the basic problem faced by the interrogator always was’ ‘Where to put me?’ Our society does run on a caste basis, whatever anybody likes to believe, for or against? My dilemma always became apparent in such situations. At home it was never discussed on a war footing; it was simplified just as Brahmins and Non-Brahmins. So I did come to know about the caste system only after I took admission to the Medical school. But as the surname was so unique I did not know how to face the question mark on the face of the person trying to judge me. As I said earlier, I wanted to belong but Not at the same juncture! They used to deduct their conclusions after listening to my diction and the company of friends I kept! Whenever it was too much for me, I used to come out and that created more puzzles for him/her. My ultimate reaction used to be, ‘whatever!’ Maybe after going through the same rigmarole repeatedly, I gradually started veering towards, ‘I belong’ status. Rather it was forced on me.

When I came to Mumbai, a huge cauldron that dissolves your caste, every caste, I ultimately was at ease with myself, rather my surname! On the contrary, because it’s so unique and ambiguous I started liking it as it did not disclose my identity at first go and I was at liberty to disclose it or not on my terms!

And the Englishman within me who ruled us for centuries suddenly woke up. I felt, though I should not pride in but at least should know from where did these ‘Benurwars’ come, I started enquiring around but drew a blank. Though it seems that they came from a place [because of semblance in the names], ‘Rani Bennur’ in today’s Karnataka, we definitely are not Kannadigas as nobody spoke Kannada in many generations before. Our mother tongue is /was always Marathi. Surprisingly my paternal aunt who is in her 90s too could not elaborate beyond her generation. The application that was not available a few decades ago is doing wonders in such situations. I was told, ‘Just Google it’

And I just Googled it. To my surprise, Pandora’s Box was opened. No, I did not get what I wanted but under Benurwar, there were more than 100 entries and it asked my permission to display more!

As of now, we are only 7 Benurwars from my father’s branch. 8^th one is so young! And amongst 5 of us, we had more than 100 entries. My niece’s and son’s research papers topped the bill. Both have international publications on their names. My wife and daughter for their exemplary work in their respective fields. I was there for my profession, paintings and blogs. Most surprising was the mention of my only published novel ‘The Heir’ being available in America, Malaysia, Singapore, Australia and surprisingly in Scandinavian countries too. But the cherry on the cake was taken away by China. It’s available in China for more than 1800 Yuan!

I love my surname Benurwar, it’s so unique!